You must have been troubled by when to say “I love you” because it is one of the greatest puzzles in our life.What if you say it first and your partner doesn’t love you back? Or if they do say it but you don’t feel they mean it? Being the first to declare your love can be nerve-racking (紧张) and risky and can leave you feeling as vulnerable as a turtle with no shell. But is the person who says it first really in a position of weakness? Doesn’t it pay to hold back, play it cool and wait until the other half has shown their hand first?“A really good relationship should be about being fair and being equal," says psychologist Sidney Crown. “But love is seldom equal.” All relationships go through power struggles, but he says, “If a love imbalance continues for years, the rot will set in.” That feeling of “I’ve always loved you more” may be subverted (颠覆，破坏) for a time, but it never goes away completely and it often emerges in squabbling (大声争吵). In love, at least, the silent, withholding type is not always the